My dear friend Jamie Bailey is a Professional Christian Counselor and Marriage Coach. Along with her husband, Chris, they run Expedition Marriage, a marriage ministry helping couples thrive in Jesus. Today Jamie explores the importance of investing in our adult children’s lives from a Christian perspective, embracing the power of love, prayer, and intentional actions to nurture their continued emotional and spiritual growth because you, mom, are positively still needed.
Thank you, Heidi, for allowing me to be a guest contributor to your blog. I’m excited to share with your readers some of the exciting parts of being an older, wiser woman and the blessing it can be, especially to our adult children. I am a Christian counselor, and together with my husband, we run Expedition Marriage, a ministry that seeks to bring joy, satisfaction, connection, and restoration to couples through the Expedition Marriage podcast, our books, courses, retreats, and seminars. Our passion is to help couples, especially those within the body of Christ, have a joy-filled marriage just as God intended.
Investing in Your Adult Children’s Lives: A Christian Perspective for Older Women
One of my greatest joys as an older mom is the gift of investing significantly in my adult children’s lives, especially as they’re raising their own children. I remember them growing up and leaving home and all the tears I shed during those years. I thought my years of being a mom were over and that I was officially not needed anymore. While there was a little bit of temporary truth to that when our kids first flew the nest and learned to soar on their own wings instead of mine, I was eventually thrilled to find out that they still needed me in some significant ways.
As a mom with adult children, especially those in the stage of parenting, you must realize that your love, wisdom, and guidance can continue to shape their paths, relationships, and faith.
Your parenting days may be over, but your influence is certainly not.
One of the best ways to earn the ability to pour your wisdom into the lives of your adult children, and get them to listen, is to show them unconditional love and support. Just as God’s love for us is unwavering, we can extend that same love to our adult children. Let them know your love is not based on their accomplishments but on their intrinsic worth as beloved children of God.
As moms and dads themselves, it is a guarantee they will sometimes be overwhelmed, self-critical, and honestly, quite scared, much like you once were. In those moments, you can show up without judgment, share your own journey of insecurities and struggles, and remind them that just as God was always faithful to you, He will remain faithful to them too.
In our latest book, Men’s Devotional for Dads,* we share much of our wisdom as parents who have already navigated their way through parenting and all the challenges that come through the years. We lay out the truth of scripture, encouragement through wisdom, and heartfelt prayers specifically for dads at any stage of fatherhood. While we put our words of wisdom on paper and would love for you to gift our book as a resource for your husband or son, the truth is that you have the same opportunity to share those exact things with your adult children. Your willingness to share biblical truth, wisdom, encouragement, and prayers with them is an investment into their lives that can shape not only their lives but also your family’s legacy.
You have accumulated a wealth of wisdom and experience at this stage of your life. Take the opportunity to share your stories of faith, lessons learned, and triumphs over challenges. Your words can inspire and encourage your adult children to navigate their own journeys with strength and resilience. You may not be wiping little noses and kissing boo-boos anymore, but you do still have the ability to tend to the hearts of your children, perhaps in even more profound and richer ways than ever before.
Investing in your children’s lives does not end when they become adults. As an older woman, you can continue pouring love, wisdom, and support into their lives. By relying on the foundation of your faith, you can make a lasting impact on their lives, guiding them towards a deeper relationship with Jesus and a fulfilling purpose, especially as moms and dads themselves. Embrace this beautiful and important calling with an open heart, open arms, and a steadfast commitment to love and support your adult children every step of the way.
You still have incredible value as a mom.
Author Bio: Jamie Bailey is a Professional Christian Counselor and Marriage Coach. Along with her husband, Chris, they run Expedition Marriage, a marriage ministry helping couples thrive in Jesus. They are weekly hosts of the Expedition Marriage Podcast. You can find them doing online therapy, speaking, leading marriage retreats, or teaching seminars. They’ve been married for 28 years and have three adult daughters. They reside in Clover, SC, and enjoy spending time with their three precious grandkids. Please sign up for their weekly newsletter to receive encouragement for your marriage.
As of the writing of this post, Men’s Devotional for Dad’s is 10% off on Amazon.*
*Please note this is an affiliate link. As always, it costs you nothing extra, and it all goes to my chocolate fund.
I love this paragraph:
“As moms and dads themselves, it is a guarantee they will sometimes be overwhelmed, self-critical, and honestly, quite scared, much like you once were. In those moments, you can show up without judgment, share your own journey of insecurities and struggles, and remind them that just as God was always faithful to you, He will remain faithful to them too.”
As a younger mom, I’ve been there more than a few times with my own mom, and she’s encouraging and supportive of my attempts at parenting little ones. Those moments help me push through my own doubts and feel confident that I’m not alone.
Being a mom is tough at every stage. Having the wisdom and support of Godly role models make such a difference.
I love that, Christine. Moms are not meant to go at this parenting gig alone. Having a supportive mom who doesn’t cast judgment can be so helpful, especially when we find ourselves in those discouraging and harder stages.
This blog is so timely for many of us!! A needed push to not judge but come alongside!
I completely agree. What a blessing to have this wisdom.
That’s exactly it, Evelyn! Younger moms get so much judgment already. We can be a true resource for them.
As a mom of college age girls, I resonate with this. It’s hard to know what to say all the time, but unconditional love is always a good thing. Thanks for this!
Jamie completely understands and shared her heart well.
Yes, it sure is! A good listening ear never hurts as well. I’m a mom of three adult daughters, and they all love to be heard….come to think of it, I haven’t outgrown that myself!